


You Also Have a Pizza

by lesbianneptune



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: F/F, fluff fluff fluff, secondary pairings: seiusa reinako and makoami, this is so fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-10
Packaged: 2018-05-01 01:23:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5186882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianneptune/pseuds/lesbianneptune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hotaru has a class project - to find out the true definition of love and report back to her class. Her extended senshi family are only too pleased to assist her, with varying results.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Also Have a Pizza

“Love is about…..”

Minako paused. Haruka inhaled sharply, preparing herself for the worst. Setsuna rapidly leaned over Usagi to cover Hotaru’s ears as Rei yelled for everyone to run whilst they still could. The room went silent as the senshi waited for the bomb to drop, praying the aftermath wouldn’t be too deadly.

In hindsight, starting this project with Minako (“I’m the senshi of love, I’m legit REAL LIFE CUPID. Who else are you gonna interview first? The ageless guardian of eternal despair? The fiery celibate with the hots for me? Nah, come on bro.”) wasn’t one of the best decisions Haruka had ever made. When it came to Minako, allowing her freedoms of any form was pretty much always regrettable in hindsight, especially when Haruka’s beloved, precious, totally and completely innocent daughter was involved.

Now, Minako was posing on a stool, Hotaru at the forefront of the watching crowd, enthusiastically manning the camera. She had been incredibly keen, as she always was when it came to school related activities, to be particularly pro-active in her Valentine’s Day project, skipping past the options of drawings and scribbled down stories to film a full-length (read: about ten minutes with sloppy home-editing in Windows Movie Maker) documentary on what exactly love is and was. Getting her extensive family involved had been the next step as, for young Hotaru, who better to educate her on the meaning of love than her loved ones themselves?

(As it turned out, there were probably many, many people that would make better interviewees than the ragtag crowd now gathered in her living room, but quite frankly, Hotaru didn’t care about their opinions.)

Luckily for all, however, Hotaru wasn’t going to be able to hear what came next, thanks to Setsuna’s hands around her ears.

“….fucking. Love is about amazing, raw, unadulterated-”

“SHE IS ELEVEN YEARS OLD, MINAKO AINO. MY DAUGHTER IS ELEVEN YEARS OLD.”

“Are you telling me you haven’t even given her the talk yet? Oh my god. Do you want me to do it? I mean, I’m assuming it goes against your emotionally stunted lesbian principles and stuff. I won’t charge, just for you, ‘cause we’re friends and stuff. I’m a lovely person like that.”

Minako may have intended to be genuine.

She may have only had Hotaru’s best interests in mind.

She may have simply been making an innocent offer to assist a friend in educating her daughter.

The world would never know, however, as the next thing she knew, she was being tackled to the floor by an enraged Haruka, and the entire room descended into chaos.

Hotaru, perched on Setsuna’s lap behind the still-rolling camera, smiled to herself.

This was going to be the best documentary ever.

–

“Okay. Let’s try this again. Hotaru, sweetie, you ready with the camera?”

“Yes, papa.”

With Minako semi-successfully placated and/or threatened into at least keeping her responses PG-13, it was finally time to move on to an easier candidate for interview – one Ami Mizuno, who was currently staring at the floor, going through her lines in her head.

“You ready Ami? Okay. Action!”

“Love is a variety of different feelings and states that range from interpersonal affection to pleasure – Mina, don’t laugh! - and describes compassionate and and affectionate interactions between two beings.”

“Ok, Ami, that’s great, why don’t you-”

“The Ancient Greeks identified four forms of love: kinship or storge, friendship or philia, romantic desire, or eros, and self-emptying or divine love – known as agape love. Modern authors have distinguished further varieties of romantic love. This diversity of uses and meanings combined with the complexity of the feelings involved makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, compared to other emotional states…”

“Do you think we should stop her?” Michiru whispered to Haruka, after ten minutes of intricate discussion on the precise and arguable definitions of what was commonly referred to as “love”. Haruka jolted awake.

“Michi. Look at these kids. This could be the only usable footage we get.”

“…but,” Ami hesitated thoughtfully, “I suppose what is most important when it comes to love is one’s own definition and experiences. For me, love is all about making sacrifices, and being there to help friends and loved ones whenever they might need you. Love is a lot of little things all thrown together like that. I think.”

She blushed and Hotaru turned off the camera. There was a smatter of applause around the room and Ami bowed her head slightly.

“Hey. Look at the smile on Mako’s face. Do you think, maybe there might be something…” Michiru drifted off as Haruka glanced to where Mako was positively beaming. She spluttered.

“Michiru! They’re teenagers!”

“Haruka. So were we,” Michiru teased, stroking a strand of hair back from Haruka’s face and watching her expression slide from defiance to confusion to acceptance.

“See? We got there eventually. Now, be quiet you, I’m terribly curious as to what Rei has to say on this subject.”

–

“Okay, Miss Rei Hino, what is love?”

Rei smirked.

“This is going out to kids right?” Setsuna nodded and Rei continued, “Well, little chickens, I have a piece of advice for all of you. Don’t ever fall in love. Love is pain, love is distracting, love is everything you 100% do not want in your lives and if you do fall in love, you have my every sympathy. Especially if it’s with a boy. I’m so sorry you have to go through that. It’s truly, honestly tragic. There was this one time a certain girl showed up outside my house at like 3am and started singing love songs to my bedroom window. Apparently, this is romance. So, my answer to the question, what is love? Love is annoying as hell and will wake you up at god-awful hours in the morning with a terrible One Direction cover. Love will spend two hours a day messaging you puns so bad they make you cry. Love will torment you until the day death finally relieves you from it. Happy Valentine’s Day!”

“She’s so kind to me. She loves me so much. Did you hear that??? MY PUNS MADE HER CRY.” Mina wept from the sidelines.

“NOT IN THE GOOD WAY YOU INCORRIGIBLE ASSWIPE.”

“I love you too, baby!”

“Somehow, I feel like Hotaru may have picked the wrong bunch of teens to do this project with…” Haruka mused as a disgruntled Rei chased Minako around the room, to the latter’s gleeful amusement.

–

“Love….feels fluffy…..and it’s like you never wanna be without them. Kinda like a puppy. And you’ll do anything to cheer them up and make them smile! Love is playing video games on a Saturday afternoon and eating cake. Love is cake. And a pizza. You also have a pizza.”

“You know, sometimes I really can’t believe that’s our princess,” Rei murmured, only half insultingly, as Hotaru thanked Usagi earnestly.

“I can,” Mako smiled, “Not to mention, she was 100% right about the cake thing.”

Suddenly, there was a crash from the doorway, and a familiar shout rang through the room. Haruka froze.

It couldn’t be.

There was no way.

Not after all the precautions she took.

Not after all the warnings she gave.

Haruka gawked as Seiya Kou strode into the room like she owned it. She could practically hear the screaming of a thousand lovestruck fans, throwing roses and undeserved compliments at the feet of their idol, all eyes on her and that stupid ponytail. (In reality, Usagi jumped up to greet her and Minako leaned over for a high five, but Haruka always had been one for the over-dramatic.)

“What are you doing here?”

“They call it being fashionably late, Ruka. Did I miss Odango’s speech?” she said.

“I talked about pizza!” Usagi chirped up.

“THAT’S MY GIRL!” Seiya beamed. Haruka growled and Michiru rose to place a calming hand on her back.

“Not just now, Haruka,” she whispered, “I have a feeling you may upset Hotaru if her papa ends up with a black eye for her interview.”

“You’re right, I- WHAT!? SHE WOULDN’T GET CLOSE ENOUGH TO GIVE ME A BLACK EYE!”

“Of course, dear.”

“Kou. Asshole. Do you wanna fight? I will fight you, right here, right now.”

“Woah, woah, woah. Chill. Hotaru invited me! As the official most adored butch lesbian in the nation – I have that inscribed on an award, just so you know, Ruka - I reckon my opinion on this whole thing is pretty damn important. Not to mention, I’ve been reliably informed that the camera just loves me.”

“She’s right, papa!” Hotaru put in, to Haruka’s horror. Seiya ruffled her hair as Haruka shook with rage. She grabbed Seiya’s arm and roughly twisted her into a hammerlock.

“I am allowing you to be here in respect of my daughter’s wishes. Do NOT think this means you have won. You will never win. Okay?”

Seiya grinned.

“I don’t know man, I am the one with like twenty thousand girls stalking my every move. Logic dictates that I’ve won this from the start.”

“What are they even fighting about?” Setsuna whispered to Michiru as they watched the pair bicker, Haruka’s face becoming increasingly reddened as Seiya’s laughter reached a high pitch.

“I stopped asking that question years ago. I figure it makes more sense to just sit back and…let them get on with it.”

–

Half an hour and a few fist fights later, Seiya was finally ready to answer the all important question.

“Okay, Seiya, what is love?”

Seiya looked thoughtful for a few moments, seeming somewhat taken aback by the implications of such a question. A blush masked her cheeks as she glanced at Usagi. She was uncharacteristically quiet as she spoke.

“Love is protecting somebody, no matter what happens or no matter what the situation. It’s putting them before yourself. And the person you love – the people you love – they have a light that shines so brightly, it will illuminate even the darkest nights, and they have a warmth comparable to nothing else, like a fire burning within them that only you can feel. You know, everybody has a star within them, and everybody’s light shines differently for different people. So, I think that’s what love is. Love is warmth, and light, and protection. Love is something only you can feel and it burns so brightly and so intensely, like a star.”

Haruka made vomiting noises from the corner. She was rapidly shut up by Seiya’s shoe flying across the room.

“She’s making fun of my beautiful speech, but trust me, when she starts spewing her crap about spooning and cuddles, you’re all gonna be throwing up.”

“And here, ladies and gentlemen, is what we call a hatemance,” Minako interrupted, turning the camera to get a shot of Haruka, “this is an alternative kind of love, often blossoming between rival butches of different clans. When hatemance occurs, the two butches will fight each other to express their ludicrous attraction to one another, whilst the femmes of the group will watch eagerly in the hope of catching a glimpse of some flesh. I mean, come on folks, just look at Michiru’s face. If she was capable of something as downmarket as drooling, she would be drooling right now.”

Haruka growled and Seiya was sure she would piss herself laughing. It certainly was a fantastic day to be Seiya Kou.

–

“Love is a series of opportunities. Love may only be in your life for a short while, but it is something to be treasured.”

Setsuna paused, looking over at her small and arguably unusual family with affection in her eyes. Parenting a newly reborn planet-annihilating soldier of death and destruction with two teenage lesbians wasn’t exactly the way most would describe an ideal family, but Setsuna could never see them as anything less than perfect. Hotaru was draped over Haruka’s shoulders, her head resting just next to her Papa’s. Michiru’s arm was wrapped around Haruka’s back and smiled supportively at her best friend as their eyes met. Setsuna continued, pride tinging her voice.

“Love is waking up in the morning and knowing there’s somebody there. Love is changing diapers and taking care of people when they’re sick and making breakfast and watching movies together. Love is drinking hot cocoa on cold nights. It’s happy faces covered in ice cream and overly competitive water fights in the summer. It’s happiness and comfort and it’s also sadness and anger, sometimes, but above all it’s the one thing that can’t ever be taken away from you, not really. Love is something you won’t ever forget after you’ve had it.”

Haruka sniffled quietly then yelped as Hotaru detached herself from her shoulders and barrelled towards Setsuna, wrapping skinny arms around her waist and beaming up at her mother.

“Well, I’m sure we’ve all gotten cavities after that beautiful speech from our resident Grandma – that’s an affectionate term, Sets, don’t look at me like that – but I have places to be, ladies to pull, people to torment, so let’s wrap this up shall we. Lesbians!” Mina turned on her heel, “Front and centre!”

“B…but…I haven’t had time to prepare my speech yet! I need another hour at least. I need to change and I still haven’t decided what backing track we should have…” Haruka stammered nervously. She couldn’t possibly go up there and talk about love and Michiru without proper preparation. It just wasn’t done. She had to be perfect, and perfect certainly didn’t wear chocolate-stained slacks and a ragged old t-shirt. Perfect didn’t stammer and stutter through her ill-chosen words. Perfect didn’t settle for half measures. Perfect would do everything in her power to make this as special as it possibly could be.

As Haruka panicked, Michiru could see the thoughts running through her mind. Years of marriage had changed nothing in Haruka’s hard-line beliefs that she was inadequate and Michiru had learned to accept long ago that there was nothing she could say or do to dismantle those convictions.

What she could do, however, was tend to the wounds Haruka’s cracked self-confidence left behind.

She took matters into her own hands, pulling Haruka up and kissing her nose.

“You look so handsome, you know.”

“Michiru!”

“What? I’m only telling you the truth,” she leaned forward, whispering in Haruka’s ear, “You’re perfect. You’re always perfect to me, chocolate stains and all. Chocolate stains especially.”

Haruka looked like she was going to cry.

“Come on, Ruka. I think it’s about time we thoroughly embarrased our daughter on camera, don’t you?”

–

“This is going to end up on youtube – 'melodramatic lesbian couple cry about each other for two hours twenty minutes straight.’ People are going to be daring each other to watch it en masse. It’s going to go viral. People are going to film reactions of themselves puking. I can’t WAIT. ” Mina rubbed her hands together gleefully. Rei rolled her eyes, nudging Hotaru’s back.

“These two are about to annihilate any street cred you ever had. I’ll pray for you.”

“Everybody, this is my Haruka-papa and my Michiru-mama. They’re married – I was a bridesmaid at their wedding it was really cool – and they spend every Valentine’s Day generally being gross and really embarrassing me. It’s kinda nice though and I love them very much. So, I guess, the important question to ask is, for you two, Papa and Mama, what is love?”

“Love is. It’s….erm….it…..I…Love is. Everything. It. Uhh….”

Michiru rubbed Haruka’s back lightly with one hand. She relaxed slightly, reclining into her touch.

“As Ruka has already said, love is very much all-encompassing. It’s an incredibly powerful force and it changes the way you behave - not always in a good way. Love can be very painful, as Rei said earlier, and love can make you do selfish things for other people. But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. You see, I’d sacrifice the world for Haruka,” Michiru’s voice dropped to little more than a murmur, “Because without her, my life wouldn’t be worth living. That’s pretty heavy and horrible, isn’t it? Not all love is that intense, but mine is. It feels like, without her soul there, mine ceases to exist. They say this in poetry a lot, this kind of melodramatic life-changing rhetoric, they teach you about it in the arts too - but it never feels real until it hits you. We can recite all these eloquent speeches and quotes and opinions but you won’t know what love feels like until you’re lost in it. With Haruka… she saved my life. And I’ll spend the rest of my life protecting her. No matter what it takes.”

There was silence for a few moments and Haruka coughed.

“I don’t think…I don’t think I can put things as nicely as Michiru can. She’s pretty special like that. Clever and stuff. So clever. I’m not very good at thinking about what love is and what it feels like but. I guess love is looking over at somebody in the morning and the way the light hits her hair and it’s so beautiful you could just stare at her forever. Little things like that. Love is never, ever wanting to let them go. Or be apart from them even for a second. Love is so special because love doesn’t judge you when you screw things up, at least. My love doesn’t. I guess I’m really damn lucky for that. Love will keep you even when nobody else would, be there for you when you felt so alone and you thought there was nothing for you in the world. Love will pick you up when bad things happen. And. I don’t even wanna go to sleep, because then I might be without her for a little while. I don’t want that,” Haruka bit her lip, her eyes glazing over. Michiru quietly motioned for Hotaru to end the recording.

She pushed a lock of hair out of the way and leaned into Haruka’s ear, kissing the lobe softly.

“I’m never leaving you, okay? Never. No matter what happens. You’re stuck with me, until the end. I’d apologise, but I’ll never be sorry for it.”

Haruka nodded, wiping a tear away from her eye.

 

“That was-”

“Mina, don’t, she’s emotional, just let them be-”

“-the GAYEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD. Congratulations, you have both outdone yourselves. And probably scared half of Hotaru’s class away from romance. Nice job, nerds,” Mina laughed, patting Haruka on the head, “No, but really, I’m happy for the both of you and your weird, slightly screwed up co-dependent ball of sapphic emotion. Really, I am.”

As she tackled Haruka to the ground like a bounding puppy, yelling about a senshi pile on, Hotaru quietly clicked the camera to record again.


End file.
